Re·spon·si·bil·i·ty

Responsibility. According to Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, responsibility is defined as "the state of being the person who caused something to happen" and "a duty or task that you are required or expected to do."

From when I was a child, my parents tried to instill the principle of responsibility in me. I was told, "Clean up your mess," and "Clear your plate." And the question I heard most every night, "Did you get your homework done?" And the funny thing is that, as kids, we felt burdened by what little responsibilities we were given.

As I reflect back on my college experience at Regis, I am dumbfounded about the little responsibility I had back then. Sure, I had a lot of schoolwork taking 16 to 18 hours per semester. And there was my work/study job. Besides those two responsibilities, the only things I HAD TO DO was my laundry (I bought a ton of extra underwear to prolong the necessity of doing it) and cleaning up my dorm room (which was only thoroughly cleaned when my roommate's or my parents were coming.) The question, "What's for dinner?" was answered by what was being served in the dining hall. I loved having a meal plan. The sad thing is that I didn't realized what a carefree life I had back then.

According to the same dictionary, responsibility also means "the state of having the job or duty of dealing with and taking care of something or someone," or "the quality of a person who can be trusted to do what is expected, required, etc."

Towards the beginning of my career I took a maternal sabbatical. I was very fortunate that my husband's job and our decision to live a modest lifestyle allowed me the opportunity to stay home with our daughters when they were little. Since my oldest daughter was born, motherhood has been my greatest responsibility.  Seeing how well the girls have turned out thus far has been one of my husband's and my greatest achievement. But our job is far from over with those two.

Wanting a job with more responsibility, I have gone back to college. My responsibilities are much greater during this round of college. Besides motherhood, my simple dorm room has been replaced by a four bedroom house that needs daily cleaning. I AM the meal planner, and unlike college, cereal for dinner is no longer acceptable. The laundry has increased greatly (the underwear trick doesn't work because the girls need their school uniforms washed weekly).

It sometimes seems like my two worlds have collided--my parenting and academic responsibilities don't mesh. For example, my daughter's confirmation ceremony landed during finals week last quarter. I was trying to find time to study while entertaining a number of out of town guests. Once my assignment was late, not because I was lazy or I was out partying, but because I was taking care of my sick daughter.

Yes, balancing family and school responsibilities can be challenging at times, but I am confident that it will be worth it in the end. To me, all my responsibilities are no longer burdensome, but rather empowering and something I look at with pride.

The Tale of Two Campuses

So here I am writing on my laptop at my kitchen table with my younger daughter at my side. She is needing my assistance as she works on her improper fraction homework. This would never have happened during my previous college experience. Gratefully that was BK (before kids.) 

But before I indulge in the vast differences between my two personal experiences with college--comparing now and then, please allow me to introduce the two colleges that I attended,

Regis' View of the Mountains

In 1988, I drove out with my parents to Denver, Colo. where they promptly dropped me off at Regis College  (I think they were doing a happy dance on the way to the car because there was only one kid left at home). Regis was a small four-year Jesuit college which happened to become an university my senior year. It is located on the northwest side of Denver and has a beautiful wide-open campus with the mountains in the background. About dozen buildings surrounded the grassy quad. If the quad was a football field, Main Hall, the oldest building on campus built using red stone bricks from the Colorado foothills, and the library, a modern looking building, would be where the goal posts are located. Most dorms and the student union are along the sidelines.

Main Hall

It was nice being on my own, away from my family in St. Louis for the first time in my life. I enjoyed rolling out of bed and running across the quad to my first class in the morning, stopping only to catch my breath and smell the fresh Colorado air. Classes were usually fun, but challenging. Although Regis is a residential campus with three dorms, you wouldn't have known it on the weekends in the wintertime. Once Friday classes let out, the campus became a ghost town when ski season hits. My roommate and I learned to ski so we would have something to do and people to hang out with on the weekends. We also learned how take the bus line to downtown Denver to shop, eat or hang-out. Denver and Colorado were the perfect place to live when I was in my early 20s.

 

Reflecting on my Regis experience reminds me of the song:  "I Wish I Could Go Back to College" from the musical, Ave. Q  (slightly abridged lyrics pasted below for your enjoyment.)

KATE MONSTER:
I wish I could go back to college.
Life was so simple back then.

NICKY:
What would I give to go back and live in a dorm with a meal plan again!

PRINCETON:
I wish I could go back to college.
In college you know who you are.
You sit in the quad, and think, "Oh my God!
I am totally gonna go far!"

ALL:
How do I go back to college?
I don't know who I am anymore!

PRINCETON:
I wanna go back to my room and find a message in dry-erase pen on the door!
Ohhh...
I wish I could just drop a class...

NICKY:
Or get into a play...

ALL:
I need an academic advisor to point the way!
We could be...
Sitting in the computer lab,
4 A.M. before the final paper is due,
Cursing the world 'cause I didn't start sooner,
And seeing the rest of the class there, too!

PRINCETON:
I wish I could go back to college!

ALL:
How do I go back to college?!
AHHHH...

NICKY:
But if I were to go back to college,
Think what a loser I'd be-
I'd walk through the quad,
And think "Oh my God..."

ALL:

"These kids are so much younger than me."

Sinclair Community College

Well, I am back in college. The fall of 2010, I started attending Sinclair Community College in Dayton, Ohio. As one can imagine, this urban commuter college located in the fine city of Dayton has a different feel to it than the campus in Denver where I spent three years (I studied abroad my junior year). I am not knocking Sinclair. During the three quarters I have been here, I have learned a lot, felt challenged and am extremely pleased with my experience. The professors are tough, but also caring. I am glad that I have this opportunity. 

 

So-Call Hamster Tunnels

That being said, let me just say that I did not choose to go to Sinclair because of its beautiful campus. Although I appreciate not having to cross two busy intersections,  I cannot get over the fact this campus reminds me of buildings being connected by hamster tunnels. I am constantly getting lost in the labyrinth that lays between Building 13 and the bookstore. But most days I forget there is the rest of the campus because I spend most of my time at Sinclair in Building 13. Gone are the days of rolling out of bed and heading to class...now I have to be ready to go early or forget parking anywhere close. 

My Home Away From Home

  

Yes the campuses are quite different, but I am experiencing a lot of the same things I did at Regis--like enjoying the lectures and challenging assignments (trying not to put them off until the last minute), but hating those awful true and false tests. Going to classes gives me an opportunity to be out on my own and away from my family life for a few hours. I do occasionally ski on the weekends during the wintertime--skiing "the mountains" in Ohio is perfect for my 42 year old body. And downtown Dayton is within walking distance of the campus. It is nice to meet up with a friend during my lunch break. Dayton is also a great place to live and raise a family. 

Photos were used with the permission of Regis University's Public Relations department and  Mr. John Getrost from Sinclair Community College.

What do I want to be when I grow up?

That question has plagued me most of life...sure, I went through a time when I wanted to be a hockey player, a fireman and an astronaut (okay so I was a bit of tomboy growing up).  So I was suppose to have figured that out during my first four years at college. Through that experience, I got a double major in political science and communications arts and somehow became a graphic designer by chance.

How did that happen? Well, it's a long story as you will soon see. I always loved to draw and create art. I actually carried a drawing pad and crayons around and when I wasn't climbing a tree, or swinging on a rope swing or playing in a creek, I would be drawing the world around me. It seemed like everyone told me that I would be a great artist when I grew up. Then in high school, I must have watched one too many starving artist commercials because I realized that people didn't paid much for great artist's work until you are dead. My high school art teacher told me that as a graphic designer, I could make money while using my art skills. She had me shadow a professional graphic designer for a day. Now this was before graphic designers used computers and after seeing the amount of work took to put a simple ad together (without a computer)--well, it was insane. I thought no thanks. It totally took the joy out of producing artwork.

So instead of going to an art school for college, I decided to go a four-year college and get a "real" job after college. After considering a few majors, I decided to pursue a political science degree because I loved politics and I thought the word "science" on my degree would make me sound smart. A communications arts degree seemed like a good fit for me. There was a time (early in the communication major) when I thought I would be a media consultant who would advise politicians before they went on the show Nightline (I was hoping to use both majors). I actually watched Nightline for hours to make sure I was familiar with Ted Koppel's style of questioning. But as I took more communication classes, I discovered that a job in advertising and public relations would use more of my creative juices. Through my communications degree, I realized how much I enjoyed writing (as you can tell.)

So how did I stumble back into graphic design work...well, during my first semester of my senior year I was going to the alumni office to interview a someone for the college newspaper when I came across an office with huge computer monitors (big for back then). I was about to comment on them when I noticed that this man was designing a brochure on the computers--it was so cool--I just sat there fascinated. So we started talking and he ended up offered me a work-study opportunity to apprentice under him. I jumped at the opportunity. I spent eight months learning the ins and outs of typography and the program, Pagemaker under the guidance of Jeff Marshall. He was awesome. And guess what? Because Pagemaker was such a new program, ironically I was actually in demand after graduation. I know it sounds like a dream-come-true story...but somehow, ever since my first real graphic design job, I felt like a fraud. Sure I was using my God-given skills to design but since I never actually got an art degree, something didn't seem right.

So now jump ahead 19 years after graduation...I have an opportunity to return to college and make myself a "legitimate" graphic designer. And hopefully, answer the question for once and for all...what do I want to be when I grow up?

And now that you know the long saga of why I decided to return to college, I hope that you will continue to read my blog because as I discovered, college can be much more interesting the second time around.